The Routine of Things

Every month we get emailed a focus topic for the month to keep in mind as we do our preschool lessons.  This month the topic is Routines and I got a little excited.  Routine and schedule is something I have struggled with in the past but when Miss M came along, I quickly learned how much easier life can be if you have a routine.

I have been doing a lot of reading on homeschooling lately and finally learned the difference between a routine and a schedule.  A routine means you do the same things in the same order, a schedule is when you assign specific times and durations to those activities.  Schedules are harder for me, especially with little children who can't tell time and don't really care that I've allotted only 15 minutes for play dough.  Routines are a much better way for us organize our days because they leave room to be flexible when necessary but are still predictable enough that the girls know what is coming next.  When I worked with children in special education preschools, this predictability was very important; it gave them a sense of safety and control over their environment and helped promote more positive behaviors.  I have definitely noticed that with my girls; they can handle a day or two when we are quite off our routine but after a little while I notice they start having more tantrums and fight with each other more frequently.  As much as possible, we try to keep the same basic routines even when we are on vacation (breakfast/getting dressed, nap time and bedtime).

I thought I'd share our daily routine and how I help them transition from activity to activity throughout the day.

Morning Routine
Thanks to Daniel Tiger, we have a little song we sing to help us get going in the mornings.
1.  Clothes On:  I usually pick Miss M's pants but give her a choice of tops that are weather appropriate (and go with the pants...).
2.  Eat Breakfast:  I generally give them a choice between two menus; they are both in the unpredictably picky toddler stage and I find it less frustrating if I give them some control so they actually eat what I give them rather than have them reject what I have prepared because all of sudden it is "yucky".
3.  Brush Teeth:  This is Littlest's favorite part of our morning routine.  I use Tom's of Maine toothpaste so it doesn't matter if they swallow it.  We do fluoride tablets in the evening.
4.  Put On [Slippers]:  The song has you putting on shoes but we don't wear shoes in the house so we substitute slippers, especially since my kitchen floor is slick and cold.
5.  And Off to School!:  For us, this means getting our chairs set up in the living room and waiting for our friend to join us for circle time.

School Routine
1.  Circle Time:  Lately I have been playing the Circle Time song from the CD to get the girls to come sit down since they generally get pretty excited and start running around when our friend comes.  Then we talk about the weather, do calendar time, introduce or review our concept of the day and sing the daily song from the song cards.  When we sing the song, it is a cue for them that we will be moving to a new activity when it is over.  Great, built-in transition.
2.  Art Activity:  I like to do the art projects near the beginning of the time in case it is something that requires drying time.
3.  Active Game:  After sitting for a few minutes, we do the most active, movement oriented activity in the manual next to get the wiggles out.
4.  Other Activities:  We do 1-2 more of the activities in the most appropriate setting (living room rug or sitting at their table in the kitchen) given the instructions.
5.  Free play:  I let them have free rein for a few minutes in the play area while I prepare snack.
6.  Snack time:  They love snack and I will often find a program on YouTube that goes along with our subject of the day.
7.  Say Goodbye:  Our friend comes for an hour and then we say goodbye until next time.  It's not elaborate but I do like make sure Miss M acknowledges that she is leaving.

After school is over, they have free time for an hour.  I will often leave out some of the favorite games of the month for them to use on their own, they will color, play with play dough or just play with their toys.  I use this time to clean up after class and work on household chores.  Then we have lunch and they go down for naps from 1:30-4.  When they wake up we will Skype with our out-of-state family a couple times a week or I sit and play with them for 30-45 minutes.  Then it is time for free play while I work on dinner.  After dinner, it's time for the bedtime routine.

Bedtime Routine
1.  Wash Up:  This could mean a bath or just a general wipe down.  It's very dry here and they don't get that dirty most of the time so we keep baths down to 2-3 times a week or as needed.
2.  Story Time:  We read a few books together as a family every night while the girls drink their nighttime milk (they are both on the skinny side and I like to send them to sleep full).
3.  Brush Teeth:  Pretty self-explanatory.  I let them do it on their own for a minute and then they know it's my turn and have gotten quite good about laying down and letting me brush.
4.  Prayers:  We say prayers together every night, give hugs and kisses and one parent takes a girl in their individual room.  Miss M has wanted to look at books for 10-15 minutes in her bed and Littlest still enjoys being cuddled in her chair with a book or two on her own.
5.  Bedtime:  Lights out, hopefully by 8 so my husband and I have a little time on together before collapsing into bed and starting all over again.

Transitions
For activities that don't have a natural transition built in to them, I use verbal cues that start more general and then get more specific as we get closer to the actual transition.  For example, if we are at the library and I want to prepare them for the transition of leaving, it would look like this:

"Ok, we have about ten minutes to play before we have to go home and get ready for lunch."
I know they don't have a clear idea of how long ten minutes is but it lets them know that this activity will end at some point so we can do something else.

"You have five more minutes to play before we have to go home and get ready for lunch."
I like to do a midway warning to remind them and I try to use the same wording so they don't have to process a different message and determine if it meant the same thing as what I told them at first.

"You have three more minutes to play before we have to go home and get ready for lunch."  At this point I also start helping them put away toys they got out and are not actively using.

"I'm setting my phone, when it beeps it is time to go home and get ready for lunch."  I will give this warning 1-2 minutes before I want to leave.  Using my phone alarm has been very effective.  As soon as Miss M hears it, she will generally end her activity without argument (I'd say 8 out of 10 times).  Littlest is getting better at this as well; it also helps that she tends to copy what Miss M is doing so she follows her cues.

To sum up, I like to set an expectation at the beginning of the activity, give a midway warning and then an imminent warning accompanied by setting my phone alarm, which acts as the actual signal that the activity is over.  Sometimes I will use a cue from Daniel Tiger during the imminent warning--"Choose one more thing to do, and then it's time to go."  This also works pretty well, especially for Miss M.

We do school Mondays and Wednesdays and sometimes on Thursday or Friday.  I tend to run errands on Tuesdays so we skip the school routine and usually get back in time for some free play before lunch.  It isn't perfect but for the most part it works and makes my life much easier.